I Am Affected. And I Am Mad.

I have followed the Michael Brown/Darren Wilson story from Day 1. Before it was national news. Before the protests, the riots, the statements, the testimonies… I wrote this last night in a 5 minute frenzy of trying to collect my thoughts.
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I have a 10 year old little brother, in middle school. Yes, a 10 year old, in middle school (because he’s a smarty pants and skipped a grade). All he cares about is who is his friend today and why they might not be his friend tomorrow. And singing, and dancing, and performing. He called me this week, excited that he gets to sing the national anthem for his school’s basketball game. And the dream just expanded instantly. “Wouldn’t it be cool if I get to sing the national anthem at a NY Giants game one day?” (Giants are my favorite team, and consequently, his favorite team for the time being.)

And then last night, I thought about how someday his life could be taken just because someone else felt threatened by his mere presence. I actually thought the words “I hope he doesn’t grow up to look scary.” The thought that his life could be taken over something meaningless, and by someone who has no knowledge of his talents, hopes and dreams, really just shattered me.

And, frankly, I’m getting tired of writing these posts. I’m getting tired of being worked up over indictments and convictions that will never come. Tired of learning of another young Black Man–especially ones who are college-bound, with no criminal background–that has been shot and killed. Murdered, if we’re gonna be correct about it.

Tired of people saying that we “fake care” and want “fake justice” and that we will be talking about other things in the morning. Yeah, I will talk about other things in the morning. But I will never ever forget the history that is being made. I will never forget the action that I contributed to. I will never forget Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown, and countless others.

I always said that I didn’t think I would have the courage to do what so many did during the original Civil Rights Era. But now, I’m over it. I’m fed up, and I’m ready and willing. This is our Civil Rights fight now. Generation Y, the Millennials, whatever you care to call us. We’re paying attention. And, we are not letting the injustice fly.

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